STEP ONE of 12 STEPS TO LOVING THE SELF:
We realise that we were giving our power away to the belief that Love exists outside of ourselves.
A STEP ONE STORY:
Your pain has a message for you. See it as a dear friend who loves you deeply and wants you to heal and be happy. Your birthright is happiness. When you have pain – mental, emotional or physical, it has come to tell you that you are out of alignment with your very own essence. You have separated from the pure essence of LOVE that you are. You have allowed the mind to take you away from the Truth in your Heart. It’s okay. Be with the pain, feel it fully and let it guide you to finding a way out of it. You will be shown a way if you truly want to heal. You may read something, see a video/movie, hear something on the radio/TV, meet someone and find a program/group/retreat or a friendship/relationship that will support your healing.
I love how life presents me with my pain teachers in such unexpected ways. One of my greatest pains has been giving so much of myself to others, that I left myself out of the line of loving care! My healing journey has been about coming out of unconscious doing and recognising what I have been doing and why. I began to see the ways I ‘medicated’ my pain and kept it pushed deep down. The ‘medicating’ ended up making the whole pain issue worse until eventually I woke up and said: “ENOUGH!”. That was the moment of surrender and then the doors of healing swung wide open. I never imagined the journey I would take. It wasn’t always a smooth highway, more like a very rough unsealed track with lots of potholes, stones I tripped over and little detours that led me off the healing track for a while. The biggest ‘medicating’ pain relief for me was to try and ‘save’ other people’s pain – the ‘saviour syndrome’! Of course, that’s a ploy of my mind to distract me from the real source of the pain. The pain of being disconnected from the love I am and from loving my very vulnerable humanity. Everyone else seemed more important. I was very loved by those I ‘rescued’ and that made me feel happy. I was never really happy within myself. It was all from seeking outside of myself for the LOVE that could only be found within. It was like I had turned my back on a beautiful small child and left her in the middle of New York City all alone. The one who really needed rescuing was myself.
This morning a ‘pain teacher’ arrived on my morning beach walk. He was just stepping out of the water and we greeted each other. He began chatting to me about his love of beach swimming and how he kept himself fit. He told me he was 83 years of age! I was impressed and told him that I’d seen men in their 60’s who looked like him. He threw his head back and laughed joyfully. He inspired me to keep going on my new fitness plan to stay active in my aging years. He told me that he’d had a fall a while ago from his pushbike and had injured his shoulder and it still caused him pain. That’s when my unconscious ‘saviour syndrome’ kicked in. I asked him if he’d heard of Bowen therapy. He said he hadn’t heard of it. I responded by telling him he should find himself a therapist. With that statement he said: “NO, I LIKE MY PAIN” smiled and sprinted off up the beach! LOL, I laughed inside. Once upon a time, long ago, I would have felt pain and rejection in such an instance. I recognised that I’d temporarily gone to sleep (become unconscious) and had seen the pain in someone else that I wanted to ‘fix’. The Truth is that pain is not mine to fix and I could use this energy to work on deeper pain within myself! I realised on a very deep level that some people are really comfortable with their pain. It has ‘payoffs’ for them. It gets them attention and especially attention from ‘rescuers’. They probably get a lot of their ‘neediness’ attended to and don’t have to take responsibility for themselves. I learned that I don’t need to offer advice to anyone who hasn’t asked for it. Or I could ask first: “Would you like to know how you could heal it with natural therapies?” I could check in with my own heart first before opening my mouth! My heart will always guide me as to what to say or do for anyone. I went away so very grateful for being given a ‘pain healing teacher’ in this beautiful way. My heart felt joy and gratitude. Life is always giving us exactly everything we need to heal from pain. We can choose to watch/listen/learn or NOT!
~Eileen Dielesen (copyright 19.3.2019)
Eileen is always inspired by the voice of Love within her. May our hearts always be joined as ONE in Love and through the words that appear on these pages may you feel the light and Love she has for you.